The naked Pine Tree
by The Cowardly Christian
Summary: Jungle boy Dipper is out for a run in the woods...and his day pretty much goes down hill from there...


**Tales of the Falls**

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

...III...

**ANNOUNCEMENT!**

**I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!**

**SUMMARY:**  
**On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!**

**The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.**

...responses...

...III...

It was a normal day in the Gravity falls jungle, men and woman scantily clad in leapord-skin loincloths, young people swining about on the latest vine, naked leapords protesting their persecution and being repeatedly striped of their dignity.

Yes, just a normal day...

...

Jungle girl Mable slept in her bed content-

**BANG!**

**BANG!**

**BANG!**

Mable groaned, it was too early! She slipped on her pelt and walked out to the catwalk of the tree house. where surprise, surprise! Her twin brother Dipper was working on another project.

"Dang it Dipper, the sun is barely up! You promised no more noise on Saturnalia day!" She remarked irritably.

Jungle Boy Dipper wearing nothing but a loincloth, turned to her annoyed. "Mable you wouldn't have such problems with mornings if you just partied at night less! Besides, I'm very close to perfecting a new vine that will revolutionize our society! This bad boy will fling people to the other side of the jungle and back! I first thought of it-

Mable groaned drowsily as Dipper did his 'nerd' talk! Again, it was too early for this! This was the fifth time this week he'd kept her up! Worse, she had a date tonight with that cute mermando fish-boy! She needed her beauty rest! Why couldn't he just find dates at the end of the week like every other jungle guy!?

Oblivious to his sisters disinterest, he continues talking. "And of course, there's no chance of me just getting stranded in the middle of the jungle no matter where I go the vine will always come back as I've washed my loincloth in a special pheromone so it can always find me!"

He gestures to his only piece of clothing, "I bet you can't even see the chemical I applied to it." He says with a smile.

Mable glared as she rubbed her eye's of sleep. "Aside from the padding you apply to it so no one notices you have nothing between your legs but a pine needle and two sesame seeds? No, I don't see anything." She says irritably as her aching body demands more sleep.

Dipper goes red, "Uh...right..." He covers his groin self-consciously while he coughs nervously. "Anyway, time for the testing!" He takes up the mystically enhanced vine, "I'll just have this bad boy fling me to a random spot in the jungle to test the pheromone's range! Mable could you twist that red flower on it that controls distance tot he left? Not too much though, I need to start small."

Mable rolls her eye's as she dose just that, "So how long will these experiments last?" She asked annoyed, eager to take off this itchy pelt and lie naked on her comfy bed.

Dipper did some quick mental calculation as he positions himself for optimal vine swinging, "Oh...probably best if I do 500 tests...give or take."

Mable's eye's glared at him, FIVE HUNDRED!? THAT'LL TAKE ALL DAY!"

Dipper nods, "Only way to cover all the possible faults." he said simply as he went back to adjusting the vine, oblivious to his sisters irritation.

Mable ground her teeth, she was too exhausted to argue or do anything really strenuous...but like BLOOD was she going through this all day! SHE WANTED SLEEP FRACKIT!

So while Dipper wasn't looking, she twisted the flower as high as it would go, that ought to keep him busy for awhile...assuming that vine didn't just bring back through his loincloth and-

Mable got an evil grin, she walks up to her brother who was still completely focused on adjusting the vine and sitting on top of the treehouse railing.

"Uh, Dipper remind me...it's the red flower that needs to be twisted?" Asked Mable as she lifts herself partially onto the railing and puts her hand near Dipper as if to steady herself.

Dipper nods and goes back to the vine.

Mable smile s at her brothers unshakable focus. "And I twist it to the left?" She asks as she undoes the knot on Dippers loincloth.

Still oblivious, Dipper nods again.

"Great, good talk!" Mable quickly hurries back, "Okay, I think it's ready!"

Dipper smiles and give an enthusiastic howl as he jumps off and let's the vine do the rest...

Content that she wouldn't be seeing him for awhile...she goes back to sleep naked...

...

The three girls screamed as the tiger got closer. Emma Sue in a leapord pelt embraced her half-sister's log girl(called that since she wore nothing but a hollowed out log) and Corn Maize girl(called that as the sacred keeper of the holy corn Maze...also she wore nothing but a bikini made of corn stalk leaves)

Emma sniffed, she was going to die here and she never kissed a boy!

**BOOM!**

To their surprise, the tiger had been slammed by a blur...next thing they know, the tiger is out cold...and in it's place is that weird Pines boy from down the tree?

Dipper groans as he tries to regain his balance, "Wha- What just-

"Dipper you save us!" Shouted the girls excitedly!

Dipper then sees the tiger knocked out cold, "Wha- Oh, yeah! Saving you from the Tiger!...Totally my plan all along!" He lied quickly.

He coughs nervously, "Well, nice to see you girls again. But I need to get going, I have a test to complete." He smiles as he sees the vine has attached himself to his loincloth, he quickly give it a yank-

...and then watches the vine zip away without him.

"Wha-what happened? I should have gone with it!" Exclaimed Dipper confused, he quickly goes through calculations in his head to figure out what wendy wrong...

So caught up with this was he, that he was only vaugley aware of the girls giggling and sauntering up to him.

"Uh...dipper...your...'Au natural'." Teased Log girl with a giggle as she sauntered up to him.

"Wha? oh, yeah. I guess I am kinda a natural at this." Said Dipper not really paying attention.

Maize girl gigled as well, "Uh...no Dipper...your buck naked!" She laughed that last part as she walked behind him.

Dipper, not really listening- "wha- Buck? No, the buck suckles can't have been the reason-

"DIPPER, YOU LOST YOUR LOINCLOTH!" Emma laughs as jumps in front of him and now pokes the now exposed part of his anatomy playfully.

This wakes Dipper up from his stupor, he turns bright red when he sees she's right! Dipper squealed in embaressment and tried to cover himself and run-

But the two girsl behind him, grabbed him and forced his arms behind him.

Emma hunches down and giggles what she sees, "Wow...it's even smaller then I thought it be."

Dipper blushed, "Heeey, come on! I just saved you!"

Emma grinned evily, "Oh, we know Dipper...that's why were going to have fun with you a bit...as a reward." She says impishly...

Dipper gulps terrified...and his genitals completely shrivel in fight...

causing the girls to laugh again, "Awww! It crawled back into tit's shell!"

...III…

TO BE CONTINUED?

**AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Go to my p,a,t,r,e,o,n account.  
**

**Love me, flame me, review me**


End file.
